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At 10:24 p.m., while brushing his teeth, my husband’s phone pings.
It’s not an emergency. No one is bleeding. No building is on fire. It’s an email that begins with the words, “Just circling back.”
In France, this would be illegal. Or at least deeply frowned upon. Since 2017, French workers at companies with more than 50 employees have had a legally protected right to disconnect. That means, employers can’t expect workers to answer emails or messages after hours. Similar policies exist across Europe, including Spain, Belgium, and Greece.
Meanwhile, in America, we’re circling back at bedtime.
The Country That Turned “Always On” Into a Personality Trait
In theory, Americans love freedom. In practice, we seem to love productivity even more.
Historically, we don’t just work, we identify with our work. We humblebrag about being slammed. We apologize for vacations. We wear burnout like a well-earned Miss America crown. The unspoken rule is clear: If you’re not reachable, you’re not serious.
I’ve interviewed hundreds of working parents over the years, and one thing comes up again and again: It’s not just the workload that is crushing them, it’s the anticipation of it. The constant low-grade anxiety that an email could arrive at any moment. That their boss might “just need one thing.” Silence could be interpreted as laziness.
Work doesn’t end anymore. It’s like the constant background noise of our personal lives.
America’s Love Affair with Hustle Culture (and Why We Can’t Quit It)
Here’s the uncomfortable truth: We don’t just tolerate hustle culture, we reward it.
We promote the people who respond fastest. We praise the ones who “go above and beyond.” We quietly penalize the ones who protect their time, especially women and parents. Especially mothers.
Disconnecting in America isn’t seen as healthy; it’s seen as risky.
And that’s the difference between us and Europe. In France, disconnecting is a labor right. In the U.S., it’s a personal boundary you have to negotiate politely without inconveniencing anyone important. Good luck with that.
The Myth That Availability Equals Value
One of the biggest lies of modern work is that responsiveness equals commitment.
But study after study shows the opposite. Constant availability leads to burnout, cognitive fatigue, poorer decision-making, and lower creativity. When your brain never powers down, it doesn’t perform better; it performs worse.
And yet, here we are. Answering emails from the sidelines of the soccer field and Slack-ing during bedtime. We’ve turned the ability to be interrupted into a marketable job skill.
So, Could a Right to Disconnect Ever Work Here?
Legally? Maybe. Culturally? That’s a higher hurdle. Because America’s resistance to disconnecting isn’t just about logistics. It’s about identity. Work isn’t just what we do; it’s who we are. For many of us, especially in an economy as frighteningly precarious as ours, being reachable feels like job protection.
Until we change what we reward, no policy will fully save us.
A right to disconnect would only work in America if we stopped confusing exhaustion with ambition and availability with worth.
What Would Real Progress Actually Look Like?
I’m not sure legislation is enough for a cultural shift. We will need leaders who model boundaries instead of martyrdom. With companies that measure output rather than online status. With workplaces that understand rest isn’t the enemy of success; it’s the fuel.
And maybe, just maybe, it would start with all of us resisting the urge to “circle back” at 10:24 p.m.. The French have a phrase for this: la vie. It’s the part of life that happens after work. In America, we call it being unreachable, and we are still not sure we are allowed to be.
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