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Editor’s note: Each week Maynard Webb, former CEO of LiveOps and the former COO of eBay, will offer candid, practical, and sometimes surprising advice to entrepreneurs and founders. To submit a question, write to Webb at dearfounder@fastcompany….
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Few things are more irritating than trying to make a point or deliver a presentation and having someone cut you off with an interruption. We typically think of interruptions as rude or disrespectful, and sometimes they are. But not all interruptions are created equal. And some might even be signs of agreement or respect.
“The very concept of what is an interruption is complicated,” says Georgetown University linguistics professor Deborah Tannen, author of Talking from 9 to 5: Women and Men at Work and other books. Sometimes, it’s clear, such as when someone speaks over you and then tells their own story. Other times we may mistake different communication styles for interruptions. And that can get in the way of our understanding one another, Tannen says.
Is it really an interruption?
Tannen recently got some social media love because of her discussions of “high engagement” listeners and the concept of “cooperative overlapping,” a term she coined. Cooperative overlappers are those folks who have a tendency to inject agreement or to “talk along” while listening. So, when you’re speaking and a listener jumps in with agreement or an outburst that supports your point, it’s often a sign of being engaged rather than rude. Such high-engagement listeners are usually encouraging you to go on and may just be very excited about what you’re saying.
Another interaction often mistaken for an interruption is when listeners have a different sense of how long a pause should be between turns, Tannen says. “The one who is expecting a shorter pause thinks the other one is finished or doesn’t want the floor,” she explains. And the person who was taking a longer pause when their counterpart started speaking thinks they’re not getting a chance to talk. This isn’t a purposeful interruption. It’s a consequence of different styles. And those speakers who are on the “high considerateness” end of the listener spectrum—those who wait to be sure their counterpart is finished speaking before speaking themselves—may find it hard to get a word in edgewise, especially if the speaker doesn’t use long pauses.
And, sometimes, you may be dealing with someone who is truly interrupting you, says communication expert David Hiatt, director of franchise development at Sandler Systems and author of From the Board Room to the Living Room: Communicate with Skill for Positive Outcomes. Combative listeners may be adversarial and argumentative. Competitive listeners aren’t really listening to you. They’re really just waiting for their turn to talk. “There’s a fine line between being a competitive listener, which means you’re not really listening, just waiting to get your point of view out, and a combative listener, who will just go ahead and interrupt you no matter what,” Hiatt says.
Interruption implications
When evaluating the nature of an interruption, it’s important to keep a few things in mind. First, active listening is often encouraged, especially among leaders. During active listening, the individual is paying close attention to what you’re saying and ensuring that they understand what you’re trying to convey, Hiatt says. In such cases, it’s not unusual to interject to ask questions or ask someone to repeat a point. “Active listening almost requires certain kinds of interruptions. If you and I were having a conversation, and you said something that I really did not understand, it’s appropriate for me to say, ‘Hey, can we call a timeout here? I’m not sure I understand what you mean by that,’” he says.
But other interruptions can tell us about how others perceive us. Researchers Heather C. Vough, an associate professor at George Mason University’s business school, and Harshad Puranik, associate professor of managerial studies at the University of Illinois Chicago, study identity in the workplace. We engage in “identity work” regularly in the workplace. They define identity work as anything that people can use to establish, maintain, or repair how you see yourself or how other people see you at work. The type of identity you’re trying to create at work “can influence what type of identity you are emphasizing to your conversations or interactions,” Puranik says.
Within the context of identity at work, interruptions can tell us something about the way others value us and our communication, Vough says. “It’s chosen disrespect,” she says.
Interruptions may have gender-related components in the workplace, as well. Several studies have shown that women get interrupted more than men—even at the highest levels of their profession. A 2017 study found that even among Supreme Court justices, women are interrupted more. In fact, not only were they interrupted more by their fellow justices—they were also interrupted more by the male advocates who appeared before them, which is against the rules of the court, according to the study.
Managing interruptions
Interruptions are complicated by a range of issues, from your gender and style of speaking to the engagement of your listener and your perceived value in the workplace. The first key to navigating that complexity is to be aware that not every verbal intersection is an interruption. If you’re dealing with a highly engaged listener, you may need to allow them to agree or talk over you somewhat to emphasize a point or ask a question.
Hiatt says it’s tough to set “rules” for interruptions, but if you need to cut off someone who’s speaking, be respectful, he says. “Acknowledging the interruption can alleviate some of the awkwardness,” he says. And work on keeping the interruption useful and conversational and not let it get adversarial, he says.
Tannen says that both speakers and listeners need to understand that the interruption may not be intended to disrupt the conversation. In some cases, workplace guidelines about how to indicate when someone is finished speaking or how to manage interruptions when they happen can be helpful.
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Standard interview questions like “Where do you see yourself in five years?” and “Tell me about a time when you had to overcome a challenge” have taken on new meaning after going through the pandemic. For many of us, the collective experience has provided a new perspective on what we want out of a job, where we want to work, and with whom.
The pandemic has also given recruiters new information they want to pull from candidates. If you’re searching for a job, prepare to hear one of these eight questions that came out of the pandemic:
1. How did your company communicate and manage employees during COVID?
With remote working arrangements, communication methods had to be more intentional. Tom Gimbel, CEO of the Lasalle Network, a job recruiting firm, asks candidates to describe the experience.
“After they tell me, I ask, ‘What did you do in addition to what your leadership team did to communicate with your team?’” he says. “I want to see if somebody took ownership of their department and communication from where the executive team stopped. If they think the company didn’t do enough, did they step up and do more?”
2. Were you afraid of losing your job?
Many employees were laid off or furloughed, and Gimbel wants to know if a candidate was afraid of being in that group. If they answer “yes,” he asks, “If your company took care of you by keeping you on board, why are you leaving them now?”
While it sounds like a trick question, Gimbel says there are good answers. For example, “I am loyal, but they let go of my boss. How I was managed changed, and I didn’t have the [same] relationship with my new boss.”
3. What did you do when you were laid off?
Employers are interested in finding out how candidates react when they face hardships or setbacks,” says Jill Panté, director of the Lerner Career Services Center at the University of Delaware. “They want to see that you worked on your professional development and growth including learning new skills, building your network, and volunteering,” she says.
What employers don’t want to hear is that you sat around for months and binge watched TV, says Panté. “Of course, we all need time to recover when we experience a disappointment,” she says. “However, we need to practice resilience and keep moving forward.”
4. What are your preferred methods of communication in working remotely?
Communication can be more challenging when teams are working remotely. Hiring managers will want to know that candidates are willing to try new tools, says Panté.
“Asking this question can ensure that a new employee is familiar with the different options out there, such as Zoom, Teams, or Slack,” she says. “It also helps you understand if they would fit well in your team. If the candidate prefers to only talk over the phone and you lead your team through video conferences, that may not be a great fit.”
5. Did you have previous remote working experience?
People who were used to working remotely pre-pandemic came with a set of skills that a lot of the workforce did not yet have, explains Brianne Thomas, head of recruiting at Jobvite, a talent acquisition service provider.
“Being able to leverage these skills from candidates familiar with a remote environment helped us to shift quickly and stay on track with productivity of typical new hires,” she says.
6. What do you do differently now?
Most employees had to make large adjustments to their workflow during the pandemic, and Thomas says candidates are often willing to be honest about how the last year has gone.
“Understanding how they have adapted to change is very transferrable to other work,” she says. “Being able to speak to how their individual remote work processes have evolved shows an ability to be self-aware, to adjust when things aren’t working, and to learn from situations as they go—all critical and transferrable skills in the new marketplace for talent.”
7. How do you clock out?
One of the hardest things for employees in the last year has been figuring out how to balance where your normal world has been so disrupted, says Thomas.
“You may never leave your house to go to work, and your typical family and community support systems were all but eliminated,” she says. “It’s important that employees in the new marketplace understand how to take responsibility for balance. If someone is just keeping their foot on the gas at 100 through the last year, we know they are going to burn out.”
Thomas says companies have seen some of the devastating impacts of the last year on overall mental health and wellness. “We want to provide the support systems at work for employees to have balance, but we also need future employees that take ownership over taking advantage of those programs—that know how to put work to the side and find time for family, rest, and personal activities,” she says.
8. What makes you excited to get up in the morning?
“It can be tough to stay engaged and motivated on Zoom,” says Shane Driggers, vice president of global talent acquisition and talent operations for ServiceNow, a digital workflow platform. “We’re looking for people who want to make an impact and find purpose in what they do.”
This question also helps Driggers understand employees’ goals and aspirations, so they get the right learning and development opportunities from the start, especially if they’re working remotely. “That way, we’re not just attracting the best candidates, but setting them up for success long-term,” he says.
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